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Feb. 5th, 2001

This weekend gave me parallel trains of thought. As well as a finally fixed cable modem. At long last.

But it was also weird, because the card shark and his on-again-off-again romance is apparently off again ... and I got some explanation by way of one of his roomates ALSO now being in an off phase. I'll call this man the enthusiast, because I've always seen him grinning or openly pissed off. Never blase or just getting by.

Well, the enthusiast's girlfriend ... let's just say she's shy. And she was taking issue with the enthusiast's desire to go hang out with his friends and have a few drinks. Why? Because she doesn't dig crowds. Not like thousands of people crowds ... tens of people. She turned down the offer to attend my Super Bowl party. She also got pissed at him because he suggested that instead of him driving the 20 minutes over and 20 minutes back to pick her up one Saturday, that his mother (who lives in the area) bring her by since she was coming anyway, saving him a trip over and back. Note that him trucking over there to get her was a commonplace event, and I never heard any mention of her contributing any gas money. But still she made a big deal out of it.

Granted, I only hear his side, but like I said, she's not big on new people. And from what he's said, that is unreasonable, IMHO. When they're happy, he's walking on cloud 9. But sometimes she brings him low, and you can see it in his eyes if you look for it in the midst of other things.

Apparently similar tough issues have separated the card shark from his gal. So there I was, realizing I was out with a fun crew ... and that my girlfriend made no issue of it. She wasn't there, but she's not a big fan of going out drinking. And she has met this piece of my circle of friends with mutual respect results.

Made me feel thankful by comparison, believe me. Amidst passing out a round of drinks the card shark commented, "So basically we're all single except one." Followed up by a smirk-lipped quip from the enthusiast, "Yeah, but he's practically married."

Five and a half years is a damn long time.

- Pookah

Comments

( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
abtarchive
Feb. 5th, 2001 01:37 pm (UTC)
It *is* a long time...my husband and I were together for about as long before we were married.

Still, being married is different somehow...good, if that is what you are ready for. But definitely different...
pookah
Feb. 6th, 2001 07:56 am (UTC)
I'm beginning to think I might be ready for it. We're at the point where having the other person around is practically a given. We still have cute moments that make other people squirm. There's already even a line of people who say we better make sure to invite them. And, since the very end of December, a few of the issues I harped on have been resolved (sex, friends, doing things together). It's all kind of come together of late.

I've even given thought to the idea of buying a ring and then finding some beautiful spot in the countryside during our week in Ireland and proposing there.

Even though I have the occasional second thought or daydream or flirtatious moment ... when I say it's been five and a half years, I say damn only because I'm in awe of the length of time.

But I'm hesitant to go for it now, since the fixing of those issues is still a recent development, and I'd like to make sure things stay fixed before I sign on for life.

And as conceptually nice as it would've been to take her to the cliffs near Galway and surprise her ... she is SO scared of heights. Ah well. =)

- Pookah
abtarchive
Feb. 6th, 2001 04:28 pm (UTC)
Daydreams and flirtatious moments dont change how you feel about her.

What an exciting time...I am glad to be on the sidelines, as a spectator!

I think you are wise to wait until things feel right though...and that issues are comfortably and thoroughly resolved.
pookah
Feb. 7th, 2001 07:36 am (UTC)
Very true. I'm glad to spread around some the joy that I got from her.

Waiting for the comfortable and thorough resolution is important to me. Otherwise, hell, who knows what might've happened by now. It just might take a little more time to let things settle out and see where the chips fall. I guess I'm still a little shaken and need to get my bearings again.

- Pookah

( 4 comments — Leave a comment )

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