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One of these days, I'm actually going to finish reviewing my resume and start sending it out places.

I spent today, like Friday, in meetings with my obsessed-with-form immediate boss. And tomorrow afternoon. We're working on a huge release of software for the project we're working on, and it's all half-designed and mostly non-specific and covered by diagrams that haven't been updated since before Christmas.

For a give-me-the-details guy like me, this can be the living embodiment of hell. I'm acknowledged as one of the most knowledgeable guys on the operation of the system. People thankfully know to grab my opinion on things once they're at the detail level, and a couple times earlier in the design phase.

But I'm also one of the lowest paid dudes around here, and half of the excellent staff I enjoyed bouncing concepts off of has left. No more think tank sessions at the local pub getting ideas after deadlock most of the day. The nature of the office has changed, and the contract and project, too. But here I am, too stuck with my own subversive sabotaging hope for the system and project to get my butt safely away to higher ground.

It's tough to be annoyed by your own ability to get along in any situation, but I've been known for trying to make things work long past the it's broke point. Partly because most of the time, I can make it work like no one else.

I'm the repairman who makes house calls. I'm the tech support guy with the answer who doesn't transfer you 4 times. I'm the mechanic who pops the hood, tightens a few bolts, pats the engine, and gets that baby to purr.

That's what gets me running. Screw what's never been done before; there's always pioneers headed in every direction including down. If you don't know what's out there, you don't know what it's worth. I want to know how it works and be the one to tell you what broke after it's been fixed and have it be a surprise.

That's part of why I don't like the approach we're taking here. There's way too much changing with way too few people knowing what's going on anywhere, and everyone trying to make new changes and assuming that other people are or aren't doing certain things. Especially when dealing with computers, assumptions kill.

And there's nothing I can do about it. It's a difference of opinion, and I can accept that. But bringing this up with my superiors will net me nothing more than a lecture as to not being a team player, or not being on board, etc. I sometimes say, "That's fine. We'll do it your way. I just disagree." Around here, I always have to add, "I see your point. You won't convince me."

I guess I just need a change of scenery. Cutting my commute below an hour each way would be nice, too.

- Pookah

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